We're Going to Disney!! (again!)

Our last trip, and where all these pictures came from, was in 2007! We are so excited to be going again!

We are leaving in March and will be there for 8 whole days!! We are staying at a Disney resort again and I highly recommend it to anyone wanting to have a 'totally magical" vacation. Only 47 days to go!!

PS...Disney vacations are more affordable than you think....you can book your trip a year in advance with a small down payment and then pay installments up until 45 days before your trip!!

Memories

Twenty four years ago, plus one day, my father was killed in an airplane crash. He had just turned 49 years old and had a lot of life in front of him. I had just turned 18 and was transformed into a different world from that day forth. I grew up in a very lavish lifestyle. We wanted for nothing and I didn't know what it meant to struggle, hurt or need anything.

The call came in at 1:43am. The National Transportation Safety Board informed my mom, over the telephone, that my dad's plane had gone down shortly after lift off and they did not think he had survived. Then they told her they would contact her when they had more information. From 1:43am until 5:20am she waited, with her eyes glued to the tv screen, for the phone to ring. The news channel was reporting that the captain of the plane, my father, had survived along with one passenger. When the second call came the NTSB informed her that indeed my dad had not survived the crash...while at the same time the news was reporting the captain had survived. Finally at about 6:30 am my mom woke me up and told me what happened. It was really strange because she told me with no emotion and I reacted with the same. I remember walking into the bathroom and staring at myself in the mirror for I don't know how long, to see if I looked any different now that my dad was gone. Finally after what seemed like forever I said to my reflection, "I don't have a daddy anymore". Still I never cried...you see my dad traveled alot so it was quite easy for me to adjust to the idea of him just being away on a trip. Three days went by and the house was a zoo. My dad worked for an evangelist that hosted a weekly tv show and my dad was the captain of this ministers luxurious airplane. He also chartered the plane out to many celebrities when the owners were not using it to travel for the ministry. As a result my family had many celebrity friends who one by one were paying their condolences at our home. The press was on it and our house was in lock down. There was a flood of people in and out. Reporters were knocking on the door and trying all kinds of tactics to get in the front door. We had three seperate funeral services. One at the beach where some of my dads friends did a fly by salute in his honor using lear jets flying very low down the coastline at the Ft Lauderdale Beach, one of my dads and my favorite places to go. The fly by had not been approved when requested but his friends did it anyway and were fined a huge amount of money, but they knew he would have done the same thing for them. It was an awesome sight to see the jets fly by and wave their wings in his honor as they passed. The second service was huge. It was in a very large church in south Florida and the minister he worked for presided. There were many celebrities in attendance and the press snuck in and film of the service was on the news that night. The focus, of course, was on the celebrities in attendance and not so much on my dad. The press was relentless, they would shove their cameras into each limo as it pulled up to get a glimpse of who may be arriving. So invasive. The third service was private...maybe 100 people. It was held at the funeral home and was also presided over by my dads employer and friend. Up to this point I had been in shock and unable to absorb what was actually going on. There came a time in this service where people were going up to the casket and paying their respects. The casket was really beautiful, dark cherry with a crisp American flag draped over it. The funeral director let us know that anyone who hadn't paid their respects should do so as they were getting ready to end the service. My uncle leaned over and let me know it was time to go up...the whole thought terrified me. After much coaxing I stood and took one, two, three steps and then my entire body broke down. I collasped right there on the floor and the grief took me over. I don't know who helped me up but I was ushered into another room. I don't remember much about the rest of the day....

The weeks and months that followed are a blurr. I was 18 years old with huge amounts of money suddenly at my disposal. I had a brand new car and was on my own. My mother had lost ALL concept of responsibility and it was as if I had lost both parents not just one. I had never lived on my own...didn't know anything about it. I had horses and started looking for a place to live and take them too. I relocated a bit north to West Palm Beach and moved into an apartment over a barn I was boarding my horses in. My monetary status had me suddenly with an entire new set of friends, but not desirable ones. For the next three years I just did as I pleased. Finally when I was almost 21 I decided to move up north to the Gainesville area...and, well, thats an entire other story on its own.

My life changed forever on the morning of January 21st in 1985. The future I had planned was to work for my dad beginning in March of that year. In an instant my future was changed and I would be forever missing someone I should have spent a lot more time with and cherished a lot more than I did. My father was an awesome, intelligent , funny, handsome individual. He worked hard and took excellent care of his family...almost to a fault as we were so well provided for we missed a lot of lifes essential lessons for survival. My dad never got to walk me down the aisle, or see his grandchildren, who would have been the absolute delights of his life. My children missed out too, as he would have been a great grandpa. So much life lost in an instant. I live with it daily and think of the accident and him often. The 'if only's' are the worst. The accident was caused when a mechanic did not secure a cargo door. The plane began to make a bumping noise and when the crew decided to return to the airport to investigate the noise a crew member mistakenly reversed power when my dad called for full power during a turn back towards the airport. The plane stalled and crashed into a parking lot barely missing a major hi-way. As it was sliding it slid into a propane tank which caused the plane to explode....

Every moment counts. be sure to tell your loved ones how much you love them and how much they mean to you. Cherish every second... The picture at the top is one of my favorites of my dad. He was in the Navy and flew fighter jets when he was younger. He was always happiest when he was in the air....

The Shack

Let me introduce you to a book that will change your life forever. It was a Christmas gift for me from my best friend. She gave it to me with tears in her eyes as she explained what she could of the book to me. It is not easy reading. It is the story of a man named Mack, and of his struggle to deal with the kidnapping and murder of his 6 year old little girl. This is not a grusome book...but a book about life, and how we can live it to it's fullest. Mack has an experience with God that we should all be blessed enough to experience...and can through reading these pages. I actually had to stop reading at points in the book to allow my mind and heart to absorb all I had read. I shed tears in almost every chapter...tears of joy, tears of compassion, tears of reconciliation...I know I have been genuinly changed. I have a better comprehension of who we, as the human race, are and how we are made react to and with one another and with God. This book didn't tell me anything I didn't already know inside...it just made it all transparently clear. The cost of the book is about $15.oo and well worth every penny

Although this book is fictional, it certainly does not effect it's ability to be life changing.

Happy Birthday

Today is my birthday and I am not sure how I feel about it. Hubby is sick and sleeping so my 'dinner and a movie' date is out. I guess I may be feeling a bit sorry for myself. I was thinking that it has been about 25 years since anyone has given me a birthday party or a cake. I don't know where we get the idea that birthdays become less significant with age. I am 43 today...to me that is even more of an accomplishment than 16, or 18 or even 21!! I have survived so much in my 43 years. I have learned, laughed, loved and cried. Everyone else had a party this year...all the kids and hubby too...(boy I am feeling sorry for myself!!). I got a phone call this morning from my mom and stepdad and instead of Happy Birthday I got asked to take them to Walmart so they could pick up a new battery for their truck. No mention of the day there either....

I am not in need of a bunch of gifts or elaborate measures...just a small cake and a few friends would be nice. I even, very out of characterly, dropped a few hints over the past few months of how nice it would be to have a small party...intimate, with friends.

Ok, I guess it's not that big of a deal right? There is always next year...

Almost Christmas...

Christmas is almost here and the stores are packed. I am completely finished with my shopping but it seems like I cannot avoid having to go back out into the rush of it all. I will be sure I have everything I need and then some little important item will be needed and I am forced out into the rush again. Yesterday it was boxes, I realized in the midst of all the wrapping that I was three boxes short, so it was off to Walmart. I pulled into the parking lot and was amazed at the chaos. I found a spot...after 20 minutes of searching...and made my way into the store. Somehow, even though the pack of boxes was only 3 dollars I ended up with almost $100.00 of merchandise!! How in the world did I do that!!

So today my one item that popped up was Tostitos Scoops per requested by my mother in law...I thought I had read the email right and I got Tostitos chips...but then when I re-read the email it said Scoops. Well no way was showing up with regular Tostitos when she specifically requested the Scoops....so off to Walmart. I did better today and only spent $58.00, well thats better than $100.00 right?

The funniest thing of all....on the way home I realized we needed carrots and celery for the reindeer! Oh well...tomorrow I will just run out to Walmart and pick some up!